MESSAGES FOR SINGLES, MARRIED AND PARENTS

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HOW TO GET THE RIGHT SPOUSE?

 Young man, God wants you to understand that He Knew you before He Formed you,(Jeremiah 1:5). You really need God, your Creator in order to discover yourself. You have to discover your destiny, God’s idea concerning your life, His purpose for sending you into this world before looking for your Helpmate (Helper). Genesis 2: 18.

You do not need the most beautiful woman in the world; you only need the woman who would make your world (destiny/future) beautiful.
Woman, you should have passion for the vision of that man, his plans, what he wants to be in life before considering him. In Amos 3:3, God wants you to understand that without agreement, you cannot do it, pursue it together. You would be a good helper only when you have passion for his vision. Marriage is beyond food and sex.
Note: Marriage is a life time decision. You must do the necessary things before entering. In the beginning, God made you one. You are not permitted to remarry unless death separates you. It is only the wicked that are permitted to divorce (Matthew 19:4-8).Also, you cannot pray for your spouse to die in order to remarry. It is murder. Such a prayer backfires.
Beloved, you need the Holy Spirit of God to discern and discover. Therefore, give your life to Jesus Christ now to enable the Holy Spirit have His ways in your life. With His leading, you will never have accident, breakdown or breakup in relationship.


The Following steps would really help you:

 

  1. Believe that God created you. ‘Before I formed you, I had known you..'' Jeremiah 1:5 God created you and He knows the right person for you, all to His glory. He would not want you to make any mistake for His name's sake.

  2. Ask for the wisdom to understand and recognize the one when you see him/her. James 1:5.3.Write down the qualities of the man/woman you are expecting. For the woman, the man will come looking for you. ‘He that finds a wife...' Proverbs 18:22. For the man, God will direct your steps. ‘the steps of a good man is ordered by God..' Psalm 37:23. Ensure that you do the writing when you are alone, in a very quiet place. Put down all the qualities of the spouse you are expecting/looking for.

  3. Make sure you do not have anyone in mind.

  4.  Please, avoid sex. No matter how you love the person. Sex will only 'blind' your eyes. There is no way you would understand the real love. You hardly know when he is serious! All he wants is sex, sex, sex. After that, he talks other things that are not relevant. Also, sex is the major thing married people enjoy. Do not give it out unless he is your husband otherwise he will take advantage of you. If you keep a sex-free relationship; the man will be fast enough to pay your bride price! He will trust you. Most importantly, God's presence will be in the relationship.

  5. Do not compromise. If he/she is not the one, he cannot be the right person. 2 Corinthians 6: 14 "Be you not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship has righteousness with unrighteousness? and what partnership has light with darkness?

  6.  When you recognize the one, do not reject him/her out of pride. Proverbs 16: 18 "Pride [goeth] before destruction, and an haughty spirit before a fall."

  7. Start working on yourself. Proverb 31 :10- 31. will guide you. You are next in line for divine encounters in Jesus’ name, Amen.  


 

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Training Our Children

Proverbs 22:6 " Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it."

From a very young age, children observe the behavior of the significant adults in their lives. What a wonderful opportunity this is to influence the next generation for Jesus Christ!

How do we train children in godliness? We start by investing time in their lives. Whether through activities, reading together, or quiet conversation, we can model Christian living through everyday activities.

Listening closely to them is another part of teaching our sons, daughters, and other children in our life. To influence them toward righteousness, we must know what they’re thinking—what’s important to them, what brings them joy, and what bothers them.

Protecting children through discipline is another aspect of godly parenting. When done with love, discipline helps them understand the wisdom of God’s boundaries and the importance of self-control.

Admitting our mistakes is also necessary, as transparency helps children draw closer to parents and teaches them humility. If we seem perfect, our kids find it harder to confess their mistakes to us.

Raising a godly child takes the cooperation of believing parents and family, Christian teachers, and born-again friends. Look for opportunities to spend time with children, listen to their hearts, and demonstrate Christ’s love for them. By modeling godliness, you influence a life for the Lord.

 QUESTION: Under what conditions may Christians divorce and remarry?

 It is vitally important that we seek to deal with it both Biblically and sympathetically.

First of all, the divine standard for marriage is lifelong commitment to one's spouse, and nothing else. Even though divorce was permitted in some cases under the Old Testament economy, Christ made it plain that this was not God's ideal. When He was asked this very question,

“He answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that He which made them at the beginning made them male and female, And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they shall be one flesh? Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder” (Matthew 19:4-6).

This seems very comprehensive and conclusive, yet He immediately followed up this statement with the following apparent exception:

“Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery” (Matthew 19:9; see also Matthew 5:31, 32).

It does seem from this statement that the discovery of extramarital unchastity on the part of one' spouse is here given as a possible grounds for divorce. God does place a high value on faithfulness, on the part of both bride and bridegroom, as a basis for a happy and lasting marriageFornication is condemned as a sin in both Old and New Testaments.

In this day of widespread sexual license, however, this provision might well become a rather common ground for divorce, even among Christians. It does, indeed, dilute the principle of “one flesh” used by God to describe a true marriage.

“What? Know ye not that he which is joined to an harlot is one body? For two, saith He, shall be one flesh… Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body: but he that committeth fornicationsinneth against his own body” (I Corinthians 6:16, 18).

This passage, incidentally, suggests that a woman who submits to extramarital sex becomes, in God's sight, a harlot, whether she yields her body for money or some other reason that she sees as profitable to herself.

On the other hand, it is noteworthy that Jesus, evidently on a different occasion, did not give fornication as an excuse for divorce.

“Whosoever putteth away his wife, and marrieth another, committeth adultery: and whosoever marrieth her that is put away from her husband committeth adultery”(Luke 16:18).

If there is any doubt, this also applies to wives.

“And if a woman shall put away her husband, and be married to another, she committeth adultery (Mark 10:12).

Since the Lord would not contradict Himself, we should conclude that, while there may be some situations in which extramarital sex would create such problems in a marriage that divorce would be better than continuing in an unhealthy or even dangerous relationship, in general it would be better to forgive earlier indiscretions (if accompanied by repentance and present faithfulness) rather than to break up what might otherwise still be a good marriage.

In both cases, however, Christ warned that remarriage after divorce amounts to adultery, a sin which is explicitly forbidden by God's seventh Commandment. Both divorce and remarriage, therefore, are extremely serious steps, and both violate the divine principle of permanent union and faithfulness in marriage.

But this is not the whole story.

“The Lord is merciful and gracious, slow to anger, and plenteous in mercy… For He knoweth our frame; He remembereth that we are dust (Psalm 103:8, 14).

”If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins” (I John 1:9).

This promise is specifically for Christians, and includes even the sin of adultery, if there is genuine repentance. The Lord made this very clear in His dealing with the woman who “was taken in adultery, in the very act” (John 8:4). He reminded her accusers that they also were sinners and had no warrant to punish her. Then He told the woman:

“Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more” (John 8:11).

He in no way condoned her sin, but He did forgive her sin, when she gave evidence of godly sorrow and determination not to sin again in this way. Under such conditions, His followers would do well to follow His example. At least in this particular context, He put no further conditions on her freedom, either to return to her husband if he would have her, or to marry another if she were already divorced.

There is one other important Biblical factor to consider in divorce-and-remarriage situations. A Christian should never marry a non-Christian, as this almost inevitably leads to serious friction in the home later on, unless the unsaved partner can, by God's grace, be won to Christ.

“Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers” (II Corinthians 6:14).

Nevertheless, many Christians insist on doing this very thing. And then what? Also, a person may become a believer after marriage, with the partner still unsaved. In either case, there is an unequal yoke, and the Christian husband or wife may come to desire release from this yoke. The Apostle Paul commands in this case:

“…If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away. And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him” (I Corinthians 7:12-13).

The next verse indicates this is especially important for the sake of the children, who are often the ones hurt most by a divorce.

But suppose the unsaved spouse is the one who insists on a divorce.

“If the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace” (I Corinthians 7:15).

This obviously means that the Christian husband or wife is then at liberty to remarry. In fact, if there are children involved, and if a caring Christian spouse can be found, it would be good to remarry, for children need the love and guidance of both a father and mother, provided, of course, that the stepmother or stepfather is “in the Lord” (I Corinthians 7:39) and desires to assume such a responsibility.

By extension, these principles could be applied to other situations that the Scriptures do not cover explicitly. As noted above, God is able and willing to forgive all sins, including even the sin of getting a divorce for trivial reasons. He has called us to peace, not legal bondage, and He can make a good marriage and a happy home no matter what the previous history of the people involved may have been, provided that true repentance, proper restitution, and genuine saving faith and sincere desire to serve the Lord now exist in their lives.

These are all second-best choices, however. For young people who have not yet gotten involved in such mistakes, it is far better—for now and forever—to seek God's best, the ideal marriage He planned from the beginning. Such a marriage is a foretaste of heaven, for it is a picture of the heavenly bridegroom and His chaste Bride (Ephesians 5:22-33).

 

I am divorced. Can I remarry according to the Bible?

Questions like these are very difficult to answer because the Bible does not go into great detail regarding the various scenarios for remarriage after a divorce.

What we can know for sure is that it is God’s plan for a married couple to stay married as long as both spouses are alive (Genesis 2:24Matthew 19:6). The only specific allowance for remarriage after a divorce is for adultery (Matthew 19:9), and even this is debated among Christians. Another possibility is desertion—when an unbelieving spouse leaves a believing spouse (1 Corinthians 7:12–15). This passage, though, does not specifically address remarriage, only being bound to stay in a marriage. Instances of physical, sexual, or severe emotional abuse would be sufficient cause for separation, but the Bible does not speak of these sins in the context of divorce or remarriage.

We know two things for sure. God hates divorce (Malachi 2:16), and God is merciful and forgiving. Every divorce is a result of sin, either on the part of one spouse or both. Does God forgive divorce? Absolutely! Divorce is no less forgivable than any other sin. Forgiveness of all sins is available through faith in Jesus Christ (Matthew 26:28Ephesians 1:7). If God forgives the sin of divorce, does that mean you are free to remarry? Not necessarily. God sometimes calls people to remain single (1 Corinthians 7:7-8). Being single should not be viewed as a curse or punishment, but as an opportunity to serve God wholeheartedly (1 Corinthians 7:32-36). God’s Word does tell us, though, that it is better to marry than to burn with passion (1 Corinthians 7:9). Perhaps this sometimes applies to remarriage after a divorce.

So, can you or should you get remarried? We cannot answer that question. Ultimately, that is between you, your potential spouse, and, most importantly, God. The only advice we can give is for you to pray to God for wisdom regarding what He would have you do (James 1:5). Pray with an open mind and genuinely ask the Lord to place His desires on your heart (Psalm 37:4). Seek the Lord’s will (Proverbs 3:5-6) and follow His leading.

There shall be fulfilment of what has been said to you. God who made His promise will fulfil it! Your breakthrough season just showed up! The things that will happen to you this month will seem too good to be true, in the name of Jesus! Get ready for jubilation this month!  Psalm 126: 3, Psalm 118:15, Gen. 21:6,